Chocolate Babkas; or, the Best Damn Thing You Will Ever Eat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i78azsi7M94
 ^(Watch dis clip)^
Poor little cliché me. The entire time I was baking these tasty babkas, this Seinfeld episode kept going on repeat in my head. But I think that Elaine and Jerry accurately display the amount of pure affection any person is going to achieve for these pastries; this affection will most likely be gained at the very moment the smell from the oven permeates one’s olfactory glands.
Okay, so, babkas. What are they, and what nice thing have they done for me lately? Basically, they are doughy, chocolatey, slightly spicy rolls of Heaven. Think cinnamon rolls, but without glaze and with tenfold times more chocolate. They also have little bits of streusel on top for that extra oomph of delicious power. If there’s anything on this planet that I suggest you try, it is a hot, fresh, melty chocolate babka. Honestly.
Also, be forewarned. This is the post in which you realize I can never be a professional baker. You’ll see why.
The following is adapted from CakeSpy’s Chocolate Babka recipe. The original post can be found here: http://www.cakespy.com/blog/2009/12/23/babkas-your-uncle-a-carbohydratey-christmas-breakfast-idea-f.html
I usually change most recipes I find, but I’ve made CakeSpy’s exact recipe twice now, and I really can’t complain at all with the finished product. You go, CakeSpy!

Ingredients:
Dough:
1 teaspoon granulated sugar
1 package dry yeast (about 2 1/4 teaspoons)
3/4 cup warm 1% low-fat milk (105° to 110°)
6 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 large egg yolk, lightly beaten
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups bread flour
5 tablespoons butter at room temperature
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
Cooking spray
Filling:
1/2 cup granulated sugar
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
4 ounces semisweet chocolate, finely chopped
Streusel:
2 tablespoons powdered sugar
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon butter, softened
Directions:

1. Dissolve 1 teaspoon of granulated sugar and yeast in warm milk in the bowl of a stand mixer. Let it sit for 5 minutes.

“Feast my little yeasties”
(Quote of the night)
♥ Stir in 6 tablespoons of granulated sugar, the vanilla extract, 1/4 teaspoon of salt, and the egg yolk. Lightly spoon both of the flours into dry measuring cups and slowly add to the liquid mixture. Beat with a dough hook attachment at medium speed until it is well blended.

Mmm I really can’t get enough of that sweet, sweet mixin’ action.
♥ Cube 5 tablespoons butter and cream it into the batter. Beat it until well blended. Scrape the dough out onto a well-floured surface. Watch out though; the dough is super sticky. Knead until smooth and elastic (about 10 minutes); add about 1/3 cup all-purpose flour- 1 tablespoon at a time- to prevent the dough from sticking to your hands (although it is inevitable. Whatever though, it’s just an excuse to lick your fingers after!).

♥ Form the dough into a loose ball.

1. Plop the dough into a large non-metal bowl that is coated with cooking spray. Roll the dough around a bit so as to coat it all a bit with the cooking spray. Cover with a towel or something and let it rise in a warm place for about 90 minutes, or until it has doubled in size. (A good way to tell if it is ready is by gently pressing two fingers into the dough. If the indentation remains, the dough has risen enough.) Punch the dough down (get all that aggression out, man) and then cover once more and let it rest while you prepare the filling (it’ll need a quick breather after all of that violence inflicted on it, anyhow).
2. Line the bottom of a 9 x 5 inch loaf pan with parchment paper. Make sure to coat the sides of the pan with cooking spray.
3. Now, let’s get to that wonderful filling! Combine 1/2 cup of granulated sugar, the cocoa, cinnamon, sea salt, and chocolate in a medium bowl.

I have a problem.

Chop dat chocolate. Chop it good.
♥ Set it aside, and try not to eat all of it before putting it in the babka, like I usually do.

This is my roommate Cindy. She is really excited about sugar.

1. Place the dough on a generously floured surface and roll that sucker out into a 16-inch square.

♥ Sprinkle dat filling over the dough, but make sure to leave a 1/4-inch border free of the filling around the edges.

♥ Roll the dough up tightly in jelly-roll fashion. Pinch the ends together, as well as the seam down the middle, to seal it up. Holding the dough by its ends, twist it 4 times or so, as if wringing out a towel.


Action sequence!
♥ Fit the dough into the prepared pan. Try your best to make it look like a scary snake or something. Cover (again! :O) and let it rise for 45 minutes, or until it has doubled in size.

1. Preheat that oven to 350°, dude.
2. A’ight, now it’s streusel makin’ time. Combine the powdered sugar, 1 tablespoon of all-purpose flour, and 1 tablespoon of softened butter. Stir and/or mash it all with a fork until it’s all crumbly.

♥ Sprinkle the streusel evenly over the dough.

♥ Bake at 350° for 40 minutes or until the loaf is browned on the bottom and sounds hollow when tapped (cool, right?).

Make sure to take a Mickey’s tall can break. This is the most crucial step, guys.


Also, make sure to lick up all the flour and sugar and chocolate you see everywhere. This is the second-most crucial step. I’m serious. Your babkas will set on fire in the oven if you don’t do these two things.
♥ After it has cooked completely, let the babka cool down in the pan for 10 minutes on a wire rack. Or, alternatively, burn the hell out of your tongue and eat it immediately like I always do (it’s sort of worth it). Enjoy it with a big glass of milk and an old movie (the recipe won’t work if you don’t add those last two things at the end).


Whoa how did my hair change colors??
♥ Okay, so all-in-all, we learned a few valuable lessons here:
1.     Babkas are the most delicious things in the universe.
2.     Stephanie can never be a professional baker because she gets drunk on the job and licks her fingers and every plate and utensil that she sees.
3.     Babkas are really really fun to make
4.     I…I guess that’s actually all we learned.

♥ HAPPY BAKING EVERYONE! ♥

Vegan Speculoos and Maple Syrup Cupcakes with Chocolate Ganache

         So, the other night, my friend Kirby and I talked over beers, artichokes, and a lovely bonfire. This talk lasted well past 3 in the morning. We both realized from this how much we love baking, how interested we are in vegan cooking, and how obsessed the other was with Trader Joe’s Speculoos Cookie Butter. Of course, this immediately turned into plans to combine all three of these passions together. I had never participated in any vegan baking before, so I was extremely excited to try my hand at it; Kirby is quite the expert though. She has been vegan for quite awhile now, and has experimented with a wide variety of baked goods (apparently her specialties are cookies and banana bread ahhhh =^.^=).

         With a little help from the blasting of “Hunky Dory” and lots of coffee, we got started on our adaptation of The Post Punk Kitchen’s recipe for Vanilla Bean Cupcakes with Chocolate Ganache.

We decided to scrap the vanilla part of the recipe, and instead added that divine speculoos, some maple syrup and a dash of almond extract. Here is our first trial of these spectaculoos (see what I did there? Oh dear God I’m hilarious) cupcakes. I hope all of you vegans and non-vegans alike enjoy it! I sure did, and I SWEAR these taste just like they have eggs and milk and all that jazz in it. They’re so moist and dense and sweet and ahhh I need to go eat another one now to shut my brain up, now that I’ve gotten to thinking about them. Anyways, have fun, stuff yourself silly, and be merry!

     

Ingredients:

For the cupcakes:
1 cup sweetened almond milk
1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar
1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons cornstarch
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup vegetable oil
3/4 cup sugar
1/8 teaspoon almond extract

1 teaspoon maple syrup
3 tablespoons Trader Joe’s Speculoos Cookie Butter

For the ganache:
1/3 cup almond milk
1 cup semisweet chocolate chips (add slowly, and use only as much as you see fit for your personal preference of thickness)
2 tablespoons pure maple syrup

Yields about 20 cupcakes.

 

Cupcake’n time:

<3 Preheat your oven to 350° F. Line your cupcake tin with baking cups and set aside.

<3 Stir the almond milk and apple cider vinegar together in a measuring cup and let sit for a few minutes so it can harness it’s super curdling powers.

<3 Sift the flour, cornstarch, baking powder, baking soda, and salt into a large bowl and mix with a wooden spoon or fork or whatevs.

<3 Beat together the almond milk/vinegar concoction, vegetable oil, sugar, almond extract and speculoos with your paddle insert. If you don’t have a KitchenAid (get on that!), then just whisk it together. 

 Mmmm check out that sweet, sweet mixin’ action

<3 Sift in the dry mixture of flour and whatnot and mix until no large lumps remain (I’d suggest using a wooden spoon if, once again, you’re deprived of a KitchenAid).

<3 Fill your ~hopefully~ cute cupcake liners two-thirds of the way up with batter and bake for 20 minutes.

(Mine match my apron AND my lipstick. You can’t get much cuter than that.)

<3 Press your finger lightly in the center of the cupcake to test if it’s ready; if the indent from your finger bounces back up, it’s good to go! If it stays inverted, bake for a minute or two longer. Transfer to a cooling rack (or just a plate because I know we all don’t have a fancy cooling rack [I know I don’t…]).

While you’re waiting for those tasty morsels to bake, you should utilize your 20 minutes to make the ganache!:

<3 In a double boiler (a.k.a a metal/glass bowl or a pot atop another pot of boiling water so as to prevent burning your precious chocolate), bring the almond milk just to boiling, then lower the heat to a simmer. Add your chocolate slowly so as to control the thickness of your ganache.

Some people enjoy it more runny, and others prefer it more thick. The less chips, the less thick. I’m one of those “the thicker the chocolate the better” sort of people, personally. Oh, and add that maple syrup, yo.

<3 Mix with a rubber spatula for about 30 seconds. Remove from heat, and then continue to stir until the chocolate is fully melted and it’s nice and smooth and stuff.

Putting all the magic together:
<3 Spoon giant globs of ganache onto your cupcakes. Really slather those suckers up. Or don’t, it’s cool. Whatever you like. If you want ‘em less sweet, then yeah, I don’t know why you’re on this blog. But anyways, do that. And then eat all of them immediately with a tall glass of almond milk and be the most content person in the universe.

Optional!:

<3 Spread some peanut butter on the cupcakes before adding the ganache! Or core a bit of the cupcake out and put that peanut butter inside for a delicious surprise.

<3 Sprinkle something pretty on top. I used pearl nonpareils. They are beautiful and give the cupcake a nice little crunch.

Let the snacking commence!

P.S. For all of you lovely gluten-free bakers out there:

I would substitute tapioca for the cornstarch, and use gluten-free flour, of course!