Vegan Vanilla Peach Pie Cupcakes

Portland. It is hot. It is really, really hot. I have been spending every summer day slumped on my stoop in short-shorts while pouring cold beer on my head and moving the minimal amount possible so as to keep cool. I call shenanigans on this entire city. I mean, I moved AWAY from California to escape the heat, damnit!
Okay, so maybe 85 degrees isn’t THAT hot. But I’m sensitive, man.
Anywho, whenever my body goes into temperature shock, it craves fruit- and lots of it. So naturally, I decided to bake something involving my favorite, the king of all that is delicious, the cream of that sugary crop: peaches! Unfortunately, I forgot this involved me being crammed into a small space with a giant machine that blasts 425 degree heat in my face. Ugh.
Okay, so, my friend Kirby and I did some research, and we decided to veganize some Vanilla Peach Pie Cupcakes that we found through Bakingdom. The original recipe can be found here: http://bakingdom.com/2011/09/vanilla-peach-piecakes-with-ginger-whipped-cream.html
We reduced the baking time by a large percent, omitted the ginger whipped cream, simplified the recipe to a certain extent, and skipped that whole terrible process of weaving fragile strips of dough together. And y’know what? It turned out as straight up MAGIC. I mean it. Maaaaaaagic.
P.S. I will forever now use the term piecakes in daily life. Because it is fun to say. Plus, the term invokes so much silly happiness in me for some very inexplicable reason.

I am drooling beyond both belief and attractiveness

Ingredients:
Pie Crust:
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup sugar
1 teaspoon salt
8 tablespoons shortening, cold
1/2 cup vegan butter, cold
6-8 tablespoons cold water
Cake:
1 brown banana
1/4 cup vanilla rice milk, room temperature
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 tablespoons vegan butter
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
5 tablespoons sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
Peach filling:
4 peaches, peeled, pitted, quartered, and sliced thin
1/4 cup brown sugar, packed
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1 teaspoon lemon juice
2 teaspoons corn starch


Directions:
1. Okay, so I didn’t have a food processor, meaning I did this all by hand. So you will, too! To make the crust: In a large bowl, mix together the dry ingredients. Prepare to get good and messy. Use your hands to squish in the shortening.

I honestly love squishing things into other things.

♥ Do this until the mixture looks like wet sand. Then, squish in the vegan butter. Do so until you have pea-sized pieces.

It should look sorta like this.

2. Add about 6 tablespoons of cold water. Using a spatula, mix it all up by folding it from bottom to top and pressing down with each fold. Add more water if it seems too dry.
3. Once the mixture has just formed a dough, plop it onto a very lightly floured surface. As quickly as possible, knead it by hand until a soft but firm consistency has been formed. Make sure not to overwork the dough, though! That’s the biggest no-no, like, ever.
4. Divide the dough in half and shape each into two disks that are roughly 4 inches across. Wrap each disk in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least two hours or over night. But, uh, who really has time for that? Not I, certainly. I only refrigerated it for how long it took me to make the cake batter, so 2 hours really isn’t necessary unless you have the time and/or patience for it.
5. Okay, cake filling time! Lightly coat the piecake tin with nonstick cooking spray; set aside.
6. Mash up the banana with the rice milk and the vanilla in a small bowl. Set it aside for now. In a large bowl, combine all of the dry ingredients. Beat in the vegan butter on low speed until there are no large chunks of butter or streaks of dry flour. Add the banana mixture slowly. Beat on low until it has mixed completely. It may be a bit chunky from the banana, and that is totally fine.

That fork is there because I was eating straight batter. No shame.

♥ Scrape the bowl down and mix for another 15 seconds or so. Set aside while you prepare the peach filling.
7. For the peach filling: Combine the peach slices, sugars, and spices in a medium bowl. Toss it up nice n’ good to coat the peaches thoroughly. Stir in the lemon juice and the cornstarch until it’s well combined. Set aside while you prepare the piecrusts.

I ate soooooo many spoonfuls of this ambrosia.


A sexy close up

8. Now is the time to scream in pure excitement and ecstasy over how TASTY EVERYTHING IS. 
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!


Yelling at the peaches for being TOO tasty

9. Preheat your oven to 425 degrees.
10. Remove one of your disks of pie dough from the refrigerator and roll it out a little less than 1/4-inch thick. Cut several 4 to 5-inch circles out of the dough. I used the rim of a large wine glass to cut out the circles.

See? You didn’t believe me.
 
♥ Re-roll the remaining dough and repeat until you have converted all the dough into little circles. Each disc should yield at least 6 circles. Place each circle into a cup of the prepared piecake tin and form little cups from ‘em.

♥ Make sure to press the corners in gently. Bake for 7 minutes.



11. Remove the pie crusts from the oven and immediately fill each cup with 1 tablespoon of the cake batter.
12. Bake the filled piecrusts for 5 minutes.
13. Remove the piecakes from the oven and place a spoonful of the peach filling on each. Return to the oven and bake for 5 more minutes. Make sure they are rotated from the last time they were in the oven. You want them to be evenly baked!
14. Last but not least, FEAST! Have as many as you want; they’re vegan, so they can’t be bad for you, right? There are two different fruits in here, and no butter, and so much love that it HAS to be heart-healthy, right?


♥ ENJOY! ♥

Chocolate Babkas; or, the Best Damn Thing You Will Ever Eat

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i78azsi7M94
 ^(Watch dis clip)^
Poor little cliché me. The entire time I was baking these tasty babkas, this Seinfeld episode kept going on repeat in my head. But I think that Elaine and Jerry accurately display the amount of pure affection any person is going to achieve for these pastries; this affection will most likely be gained at the very moment the smell from the oven permeates one’s olfactory glands.
Okay, so, babkas. What are they, and what nice thing have they done for me lately? Basically, they are doughy, chocolatey, slightly spicy rolls of Heaven. Think cinnamon rolls, but without glaze and with tenfold times more chocolate. They also have little bits of streusel on top for that extra oomph of delicious power. If there’s anything on this planet that I suggest you try, it is a hot, fresh, melty chocolate babka. Honestly.
Also, be forewarned. This is the post in which you realize I can never be a professional baker. You’ll see why.
The following is adapted from CakeSpy’s Chocolate Babka recipe. The original post can be found here: http://www.cakespy.com/blog/2009/12/23/babkas-your-uncle-a-carbohydratey-christmas-breakfast-idea-f.html
I usually change most recipes I find, but I’ve made CakeSpy’s exact recipe twice now, and I really can’t complain at all with the finished product. You go, CakeSpy!

Ingredients:
Dough:
1 teaspoon granulated sugar
1 package dry yeast (about 2 1/4 teaspoons)
3/4 cup warm 1% low-fat milk (105° to 110°)
6 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 large egg yolk, lightly beaten
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups bread flour
5 tablespoons butter at room temperature
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
Cooking spray
Filling:
1/2 cup granulated sugar
3 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon sea salt
4 ounces semisweet chocolate, finely chopped
Streusel:
2 tablespoons powdered sugar
1 tablespoon all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon butter, softened
Directions:

1. Dissolve 1 teaspoon of granulated sugar and yeast in warm milk in the bowl of a stand mixer. Let it sit for 5 minutes.

“Feast my little yeasties”
(Quote of the night)
♥ Stir in 6 tablespoons of granulated sugar, the vanilla extract, 1/4 teaspoon of salt, and the egg yolk. Lightly spoon both of the flours into dry measuring cups and slowly add to the liquid mixture. Beat with a dough hook attachment at medium speed until it is well blended.

Mmm I really can’t get enough of that sweet, sweet mixin’ action.
♥ Cube 5 tablespoons butter and cream it into the batter. Beat it until well blended. Scrape the dough out onto a well-floured surface. Watch out though; the dough is super sticky. Knead until smooth and elastic (about 10 minutes); add about 1/3 cup all-purpose flour- 1 tablespoon at a time- to prevent the dough from sticking to your hands (although it is inevitable. Whatever though, it’s just an excuse to lick your fingers after!).

♥ Form the dough into a loose ball.

1. Plop the dough into a large non-metal bowl that is coated with cooking spray. Roll the dough around a bit so as to coat it all a bit with the cooking spray. Cover with a towel or something and let it rise in a warm place for about 90 minutes, or until it has doubled in size. (A good way to tell if it is ready is by gently pressing two fingers into the dough. If the indentation remains, the dough has risen enough.) Punch the dough down (get all that aggression out, man) and then cover once more and let it rest while you prepare the filling (it’ll need a quick breather after all of that violence inflicted on it, anyhow).
2. Line the bottom of a 9 x 5 inch loaf pan with parchment paper. Make sure to coat the sides of the pan with cooking spray.
3. Now, let’s get to that wonderful filling! Combine 1/2 cup of granulated sugar, the cocoa, cinnamon, sea salt, and chocolate in a medium bowl.

I have a problem.

Chop dat chocolate. Chop it good.
♥ Set it aside, and try not to eat all of it before putting it in the babka, like I usually do.

This is my roommate Cindy. She is really excited about sugar.

1. Place the dough on a generously floured surface and roll that sucker out into a 16-inch square.

♥ Sprinkle dat filling over the dough, but make sure to leave a 1/4-inch border free of the filling around the edges.

♥ Roll the dough up tightly in jelly-roll fashion. Pinch the ends together, as well as the seam down the middle, to seal it up. Holding the dough by its ends, twist it 4 times or so, as if wringing out a towel.


Action sequence!
♥ Fit the dough into the prepared pan. Try your best to make it look like a scary snake or something. Cover (again! :O) and let it rise for 45 minutes, or until it has doubled in size.

1. Preheat that oven to 350°, dude.
2. A’ight, now it’s streusel makin’ time. Combine the powdered sugar, 1 tablespoon of all-purpose flour, and 1 tablespoon of softened butter. Stir and/or mash it all with a fork until it’s all crumbly.

♥ Sprinkle the streusel evenly over the dough.

♥ Bake at 350° for 40 minutes or until the loaf is browned on the bottom and sounds hollow when tapped (cool, right?).

Make sure to take a Mickey’s tall can break. This is the most crucial step, guys.


Also, make sure to lick up all the flour and sugar and chocolate you see everywhere. This is the second-most crucial step. I’m serious. Your babkas will set on fire in the oven if you don’t do these two things.
♥ After it has cooked completely, let the babka cool down in the pan for 10 minutes on a wire rack. Or, alternatively, burn the hell out of your tongue and eat it immediately like I always do (it’s sort of worth it). Enjoy it with a big glass of milk and an old movie (the recipe won’t work if you don’t add those last two things at the end).


Whoa how did my hair change colors??
♥ Okay, so all-in-all, we learned a few valuable lessons here:
1.     Babkas are the most delicious things in the universe.
2.     Stephanie can never be a professional baker because she gets drunk on the job and licks her fingers and every plate and utensil that she sees.
3.     Babkas are really really fun to make
4.     I…I guess that’s actually all we learned.

♥ HAPPY BAKING EVERYONE! ♥